Alligator River
Jul. 3rd, 2007 09:33 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lurkittyMore about my counseling days.
Continuing contemplation of my days as a counselor.
There was a special kind of disconnect that I adopted as a counselor. I learned early not to let clients in to my inner self. I built barriers to prevent that. I shut down a lot of empathy, as there were those who capitalized on vulnerability. I wasn't that I did not care about my clients, it was that I could not allow the exchange of empathy to connect us. I knew too many good counselors that were sidelined because the got too close to a client.
I am a storyteller at heart. My counseling style reflected that. my most successful group therapy sessions started with a story, then each member being able to relate themselves to it. So much of people's problems with other people stem from misapprehension about each other. The alcoholics and addicts I worked with had a very heard time putting themselves in another person's shoes; that ability to sense pain and suffering in others being one that was readily aenesthetised with drugs. Stories allow people to safely step into another person's skin and judge the situation from their point of view.
One of my favorite tools was a game called "Alligator River". Prince Charming and Snow White live in a cottage on the banks of the Alligator River. One day, Prince Charming sets out to go to town, and he is beset by Pirates! The Pirate Captain has the hots for Snow White, and threatens to kill Prince Charming if she doesn't have sex with him.
She acquiesces, and her Prince is freed. When the Prince comes home, he finds out that his Snow White hasn't been faithful. Charming beats her up and throws her out.
1. Rank the people (The Pirate, Prince Charming and Snow White) in this scenario from least bad to worst.
2. Explain your rationale for each ranking.
I got every result possible for this scenario. Some sided with Snow White, who gave of herself to save her Prince. Some with the Pirate, who was true to his word and was only doing business. Some even sided with Charming, saying he had a right to expect his woman to be true to him. They're reactions were often quite telling. The discussions this game elicited were were very insightful.
Still and all, though I had good boundaries, I finally had to quit the profession because it got to me.
Continuing contemplation of my days as a counselor.
There was a special kind of disconnect that I adopted as a counselor. I learned early not to let clients in to my inner self. I built barriers to prevent that. I shut down a lot of empathy, as there were those who capitalized on vulnerability. I wasn't that I did not care about my clients, it was that I could not allow the exchange of empathy to connect us. I knew too many good counselors that were sidelined because the got too close to a client.
I am a storyteller at heart. My counseling style reflected that. my most successful group therapy sessions started with a story, then each member being able to relate themselves to it. So much of people's problems with other people stem from misapprehension about each other. The alcoholics and addicts I worked with had a very heard time putting themselves in another person's shoes; that ability to sense pain and suffering in others being one that was readily aenesthetised with drugs. Stories allow people to safely step into another person's skin and judge the situation from their point of view.
One of my favorite tools was a game called "Alligator River". Prince Charming and Snow White live in a cottage on the banks of the Alligator River. One day, Prince Charming sets out to go to town, and he is beset by Pirates! The Pirate Captain has the hots for Snow White, and threatens to kill Prince Charming if she doesn't have sex with him.
She acquiesces, and her Prince is freed. When the Prince comes home, he finds out that his Snow White hasn't been faithful. Charming beats her up and throws her out.
1. Rank the people (The Pirate, Prince Charming and Snow White) in this scenario from least bad to worst.
2. Explain your rationale for each ranking.
I got every result possible for this scenario. Some sided with Snow White, who gave of herself to save her Prince. Some with the Pirate, who was true to his word and was only doing business. Some even sided with Charming, saying he had a right to expect his woman to be true to him. They're reactions were often quite telling. The discussions this game elicited were were very insightful.
Still and all, though I had good boundaries, I finally had to quit the profession because it got to me.
